This just in: for real this time

Science, or Devil Worship?Our roving reporter has just submitted some spy photos of mysterious goings-on at the Blackwalt Estate.

Local residents have been complaining for days about random power surges, and strange noises and smells emanating from the secluded home of Sigfried von Blackwalt, of the eccentric von Blackwalt clan of St. Catharines.

When asked about their reclusive neighbours, long-time area resident Biff "The Knife" Stabberson said: "I dunno what they'se doin' in thar, but I'd stay away if I was you. I seen at least a dozen truckloads of gravel go in there, as if they're tryin' ta bury somethin' permanent-like. I'm afeared ta go out at night, an' I'm the local drug lord!"

Other neighbours refused to go on record, citing personal safety reasons, although several suggested the von Blackwalts have strong links to the occult. Others blame their affiliation with the Nazi party, claiming the estate is regularly being used as some sort of rally headquarters. The two are probably not related.

This can't be good.

Reading from a prepared statement Thursday, clan leader Sigfried von Blackwalt stated "I am not doing anything illegal here, at all. People should stop harassing me. That nosey reporter who claimed I was running a secret laboratory should have his puny 1,236.8 gram brain examined."

Local police have stepped up patrols in the area, but have so far declined to comment on the complaints, or the recent rash of apparent grave robberies at the nearby cemetery.