You are hereJust when we were thinking there was no chance.

Just when we were thinking there was no chance.

By Blackwalt - Posted on 25 July 2008

Don't All hope abandon, ye who enter here!

Well you all know my suspicions about MoriceRevek and Stormblade... no, no, not those suspicions... these suspicions!

It turns out that if true, it could actually improve their chances! Something previously thought impossible. It seems there is a match for everyone.

I don't see this ending well.

Stormblade's picture

I hate you.

A Troll's picture

I will pay you to take her. I've never met you in person, but compared to her ex husband you are a genius! Unless you have a third eye in the middle of your fore head, she can look past anything else.

More importantly, my wife would stop asking me if I know anyone that would be interested in her sister. Her sister is not bad looking, she is just different.

Q-Bert's picture


Blackwalt's picture

Different like MoriceRevek different?

Or different like Stormblade different?

Or just different different?

Akuf's picture

I am offended.

Stormblade's picture

Nobody's that different.

Coxxorz's picture

if she has facial hair.

Coxxorz's picture

Define "different".

A Troll's picture

I can't put a finger on it. She seems to have a lot of bad luck.

A Troll's picture

She hasn't had a vacation for awhile, so I'll suggest to my wife that we send her sister n a vacation. I'll get a packing crate and ship her off to the Great Unknown that is commonly called Canada. She is tough, so you had better be able to convince her the whole thing is her idea or you may not be needing any toothpaste for awhile.

Akuf's picture

...depending on how many beers and where she lies in my toothpaste scale (outlined below). I might be able to squeeze her in but you will have to UPS her or something.

Little bit of a back story one of my famous sayings when I see some hot chick is "I would f*ck her in the mouth". Well one time I went to an Alcatel function invited by a couple of friends and there was this hot chick there and of course I said that, being ignorant to the fact that my buddy's boss was behind me and heard it. However, he (the boss) did nod his agreement. Anyway, he came up to me and said I agree but try not to be so loud. So, my buddy suggested a code word that would mean the saying and somehow we came up with Colgate Girl. Which eventually spawned this rating system:

Colgate Girl
Think of her like a 10
Would actively like to f*k her in the mouth or anywhere else without hesitation. Would boast that I did and would try to get her as often as possible. But a girl this good, every one else wants to f*k her in the mouth as well. She would be a trophy girlfriend but with that comes the necessity for some Advil. No alcohol necessary (in stormblade's and Revek's they would have to get the girls drunk).

Crest Girl
Think of her like a 9
Would f*k her in the mouth or anywhere else but if a colgate girl comes a long a little alcohol might be necessary to choose a crest girl (in stormblade's and Revek's they would have to get the girls drunk). With any luck you can start a cat fight between a colgate girl and a crest girl. Though like the colgate girl she is up there in the scale so be aware that a lot of others would like her as well. I think the crest girl is would be the optimal girlfriend. She has looks and I think she would be a little more trustworthy than a colgate girl. But I think Advil will also be necessary though not as much.

Aquafresh Girl
Think of her like a 7-8
Would f*k her in the mouth or anywhere else. However, the first time you sleep with an aquafresh girl some alcohol might be necessary (in stormblade's and Revek's they would have to get the girls drunk). But you would admit to sleeping with her with no hesitation. Aquafresh girls are probably your best bet for a good girlfriend or even a wife. Though they are not as good looking as colgate or crest. They can be a lot of fun and their looks are good enough that they will turn heads. And they are also probably loyal as well.

Think of her like a 5-6
Would f*k her in the mouth or anywhere else while being extremely drunk (in stormblade's and Revek's case they would probably still may to get the girls drunk but perhaps not). But I would not admit to it. This type girl it might be best that you do not take her to your place. Because she may not want to leave. And if she knows where you live and you don’t call her she may become a bunny boiler and/or stalker. You may want to take a break from going out for a while for two reasons: 1) if anyone saw you leave with her they will make fun of you. 2) if she see’s you out and about she will track you down and try to get you again. Beware of the Sensodyne girl.

Think of her like anything less than a 5
If you have to result to this please do not admit to it and ensure that you are so drunk that you will forget it as well. However the next morning with that blistering hangover you will be in for a surprise. I would leave on vacation for at least a year because someone must have seen you leave with her. And hopefully a year is long enough for any witness to forget this dreadful event. More importantly hopefully she will forget about you within that timeframe (though unlikely). When you return keep looking over your shoulder because polident girls are psychopathic bunny boilers. In stormblade and Revek's case beggers can't be choosers

Akuf's picture

...Since Zombies are supposedly mindless I think Revek and Stormblade should have no problem scoring.

On the other hand...

If they can see...well...sorry guys...


Please stop talking.


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